Madonna of Madrid Lists Los Angeles Hideaway

SELLER: Penelope Cruz
LOCATION: Los Angeles, CA
PRICE: $3,695,000
SIZE: 3,334 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 3.5 bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: This morning Your Mama received a lovely missive from Big Dave at Celebrity Address Aerial who pointed our beady little eyes in the direction of a "Balinese Modern" style residence above Los Angeles' Sunset Strip owned and listed for sale by freakishly fetching actress Penelope Cruz, a.k.a the Madonna of Madrid.

Unlike all these talent free pretty faces that inhabit Tinseltown–you know who you are ladees–Miss Cruz is a force to be reckoned with on the silver screen earning an Oscar for her part in Woody Allen's Vicky Cristina Barcelona plus two additional nominations for Nine and Volver. She also appeared in All the Pretty Horses, Vanilla Sky, Gothika and Los Abrazos Rotos, her fourth film with Oscar winning and flaw-less filmmaker Pedro Almodóvar.

The never married Miss Cruz tends to keep her private life private but according to all the gossip glossies she has a penchant for coupling up with her high profile co-stars such as Matt Damon, that creepy Tom Crooz character with whom she is still palzee-walzee, and her current beau–the most handsome, sexy and talented of them all–Oscar winning actor Javier Bardem (Vicky Cristina Barcelona, No Country for Old Men, Before Night Falls, Jamón Jamón)

Property records show that Miss Cruz, who speaks an impressive four languages, purchased her Sunset Strip area residence in May of 2005 for $3,138,000. Apparently Miss Cruz only used the property as an occasional crash pad because in 2008 she put the place out for lease at $14,500 per month and the property is still listed as available for locations shoots through at least one of the many location agencies in Los Angeles. This is sort of strange for a ladee known to protect her privacy and personal life like a mama bear protecting her cub.

Anyhoo, listing information and property records for Miss Cruz's crib both agree that the single story house measures 3,334 square feet and includes 3 bedooms and 3.5 poopers plus a room for the maid or office use. Carved wood doors open from the street into a small courtyard with fountain that leads to the front door. Due to the parcel's pie shape, the interior spaces are punished with some awkward angles and odd relationships between rooms, i.e. the living, dining and family room areas. Some of the wacky angles and relationships are soothed by the uniformity of the bamboo floors laid throughout the house and when the house was fully decked out with Miss Cruz's combination of Bali meets Hollywood glam there was a flow to the spaces that made them feel more appropriately positioned.

The good sized gourmet kitchen has all the expected high grade appliances and granite counter tops but we're a little concerned about the pea soup green colored cabinetry, a color that unfortunately repeats itself on the wood frames surrounding the windows and French doors in the rest of the house. Maybe in real life that hue works better, but in pictures it's kind of bone chilling.

Miss Cruz's boo-dwar opens to the back yard through French doors and includes a wall of wardrobes and dressing area with a full length mirror perfect for the pre-red carpet dress checks, sitting area, and a bathroom commodious enough to contain an antique dining room table and two slip covered chairs. We're not sure exactly why Miss Cruz would want an antique dining table in her pooper but perhaps she like to take her morning tea near the terlit or play Canasta with her assistant before she steps into the shower.

The house wraps around a large terrace at the back of the house. A classic kidney shaped swimming pool is surrounded by several lounging locations and a swatch of grass that gives way to a down slope and downtown views.

Miss Cruz's nearby neighbors include writer/producer Aaron Sorkin (The West Wing, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, Charlie Wilson's War) and Guinness heiress Evgenia Citkowitz and her man-mate actor Julian Sands (Boxing Helena, 24, Lipstick Jungle) who made the knees of Your Mama and everyone else we knew buckle with desire back in 1985 when he starred as George Emerson in A Room With A View.

photos: Sotheby's International Realty / Brett Lawyer

Matheus Minas & Leandro

Ao Vivo em Cajamar - 2009

01 Jeito de menina
02 Trem bão
03 Céu de solidão
04 Pra sempre em meus braços
05 Apaixonado nela
06 Coração vagabundo
07 Apaixonei de novo / Sincero amor / Saudade pesada
08 Cai na real
09 Chuva que cai
10 Na boca do litro
11 Te amo e não te quero
12 Coração de madeira
13 Chamada à cobrar / Paixão de peão
14 Hoje eu quero te amar

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Oh No She Diuhnt! And Oh No He Diuhnt!

We should prolly just keep our fat trap shut about this because it's barely about real estate but we can't help it...

Your Mama was perusing Curbed LA yesterday afternoon awaiting inspiration and lightening to strike when we read with a grisly combination of righteous indignation and breathless flabbergast their rehash of the utterly absurd US Magazine report about how Brad freaking Pitt–allegedly–has his panties in a twist about his ex-wife Jennifer Aniston's new found affection for all things architecture.

See puppies, architecture is kinda Brad's thing, you know? Apparently–and allegedly–back when the Pittster and Missy Hoo Hoo were still married and re-working Wallis Annengberg's big ol' house in Beverly Hills she would mock poor Brad for his thing, you know? So he's little sensitive and possessive about his thing, you know?

Then along comes the big, ugly dee-vorce–that was, mind y'all, finalized 5 damn years ago–and Mister Pitt's seemingly endless adoptions and breeding events with Angelina Jolie, all of which–according to previous tabloid reports–left ex-Missus Pitt bereft and tumbling into the arms of bad boys like Vince Vaughan and diarrhea mouthed musician Jon Mayer.

If Us Magazine's unidentified source is to be believed–and we paraphrase liberally here–when jealously didn't work it's bitter magic on the Pittster ex-Missus Pitt moved on to Plan B: She went and bought herself a humongous Hal Leavitt designed house in Beverly Hills and then proceeded to pay nice, gay decorator Stephen Shandley a pretty penny or three to do up the place in a kind of high style, an time consuming and exceedingly exercise that was all, according to Us Magazine's source, just a pathetic "ploy" to get the Pittster's attention.

Bitch, pleeze.

Are we, the tabloid reading public, really supposed to believe that ex-Missus Pitt is so wrecked and desperate to restart her long dead romance with the Pittster and that rat's nest on his chin that she would spend a staggering $13,500,000 to buy an architecturally significant home and god only knows how many millions more on a re-do just so that she could get her pretty house on the cover of Architectural damn Digest and thus, finally and at long last, snatch the Pittster's attentions away from his global do-gooding baby momma Angelina Jolie and their 87 children? Really?

Listen celery sticks, Your Mama his hardly Miz Aniston's biggest fan but even our cynical pea-sized brain does not and can not allow us to believe that Miz Aniston is that many kinds of berserk. Like that Bravo tee-vee executive and budding talk show queen Andy Cohen says, "Here's what:" All these gossip glossies have just got to drop their incessant and stoopid bizness about ex-Missus Aniston still spending her nights lonely and locked up in her Hal Leavitt designed and Stephen Shandley re-worked mansion pining away for the Pittster and his architectural thing. It's tie-urd. A been there and done that so many times times we got a bladder infection kind of tie-urd.

Okay? Enough.

Nuevas fotos de Ruby Demestoy

Nuevas fotos del facebook de Ruby de su viaje a St martins, St bart y Anguilla. Preciosa como siempre !!

Alexandra Rodríguez

Alexandra Rodríguez grabando la novela "Quiereme Tonto" en Mexico.

A Bel Air Beast In Contract

Strap on your safety belts, hitch up your britches and grab a big fat nerve pill children because there's a big deal going down in Bel Air that is sure to drop jaws and make every owner of a home listed at more than $25,000,000 grin with glee and breathe a deep sigh of relief that there really may be some life in the extreme upper end of the Los Angeles property market.

In February of 2009, amid much hoopla and tittering by real estate watchers and gossips, real estate developer Mohamed Hadid listed his newly completed, colossal 48,000 square foot beast in Los Angeles' uppity Bel Air neighborhood with an equally uppity and porcine asking price of $85,000,000.

The price of the ridiculously opulent 10 bedroom and 14 pooper pile that sits on 2.2 acres was dropped to $72,000,000 in August of 2009. After more than a year on the market the listing is now marked, "Backup Offers Accepted" indicating a deal is in the works for three floor monster mansion that includes 19 fireplaces, a 280 degree view, a 5,000 bottle wine cellar, an honest to goodness ballroom, a professional screening room, a Moroccan themed lounge and Turkish hammam (erroneously spelled "hummam" on the listing), a damn swan pond, and more tangled and tortured boiserie than the damn Palace of Versailles.

Suzanne Saperstein, Candy Spelling and Iris Cantor–a trio of wildly rich single ladees who all have booteek hotel sized houses in Los Angeles on the market–must be spitting jealous and seeing red that they've been trying to unload their high-priced white elephants for years and years and years with no luck and along comes Mister Mohammad Hadid who snatches up a buyer for his insanely expensive behemoth after just 420-some days.

Naturally, upon getting wind of the deal Your Mama put out feelers with a few of our better connected peeps in the Platinum Triangle. Of course, everything is secret, secret, secret regarding the potential deal but what we're hearing back from two separate sources is that the buyer is a big money foreigner and that the deal is going down in the fifty million dollar range. Have mercy. A third source with deep connections in the high end Bev Hills-Bel Air real estate world told Your Mama the "alleged" price being bandied about is closer to sixty million and suspects there may be some kind of business connection/relationship between the seller and buyer.

Other than that the property is marked "Looking for Backup" Your Mama can't confirm any of this information. At this point it's just rumor and gossip. Got that kids? Rumor and gossip. We won't know the real details until the deeds and records are recorded or, more likely, we read about it in one of the more respectable real estate gossip columns.

Mister Hadid, who claims he spent $59,000,000 building the massive manse, made much of his millions developing Ritz-Carlton hotels as well as lavish mansions like the Bel Air behemoth on Carolwood Drive where Michael Jackson expired under suspicious circumstances in June of 2009.

photo: Coldwell Banker Previews / Joyce Rey

Summer's A Comin': Rent Stephen Dorff's Beach House

OWNER: Stephen Dorff
LOCATION: Malibu, CA
PRICE: $50,000/month
SIZE: 2,298 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Summer's a comin' children and it's time to get your beach rentals lined up and paid for or else you'll be stuck with some shackety-shack in downmarket Hamptons Bays or, even worse, spending weekends next door to a party house in Malibu sponsored by some dorky company who names the house something even more dorky like the Silver Cup House of Sand and Sunshine.

Those with an architectural bent–and a left coast location–might consider this little Buff & Hensman designed number on Malee-boo's La Costa beach that happens to be owned by itty bitty hot bodied actor Stephen Dorff who recently put his contemporary crib out for lease at $50,000 per month fully furnished.

Mister Dorff, for those not familiar with his work and body parts, got his start on the boob toob way back when with small parts on programs such as Diff'rent Strokes and Married With Children. He went on to movie stardom with roles in I Shot Andy Warhol, Shadowboxer–in which he shamelessly bares his condom covered naughty bits, Cold Creek Manor–in which he was panned, World Trade Center, Deuces Wild, Cecil B. Demented, Backbeat and Blade. He will soon appear as a porn star in Adam Sandler's Born To Be A Star and Sofia Coppola's upcoming and anticipated Sunshine.

The actor, who often portrays hot head characters is perhaps as well known for his cockswordmanship as his acting. He's a notorious dater of moe-dells and his catwalker conquests include Shannan Click and Rhea Durham, now Mark Wahlberg's baby momma and new wife. Mister Dorff has also worked his way through a large number of famous actresses including Alicia Silverstone, Reese Witherspoon, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Pam Anderson, and Milla Jovovich. He is also widely rumored to have had some sort of thing with REM front man Michael Stipe although neither cop to anything more than a close friendship.

Property records show that Mister Dorff scooped up his beach house in December of 2001 paying $2,546,000 for the architecturally significant residence on La Costa beach, one of the sandier and more desirable beaches in the Boo. Listing information and property records both indicate the modern abode was built in 1969 and measures 2,298 square feet with 3 bedrooms and 3 poopers including an ocean side master suite with access to a private deck through a wide wall of floor to ceiling glass.

Listing information states the day-core was done up by noted Los Angeles decorator to the stars Brad Dunning who, in addition to Mister Dorff's beach house, has worked over interiors for folks like fashion queen turned filmmaker Tom Ford, fashion photographer Dewey Nicks, über agent Bryan Lourd, and Demi Moore and Asthon Kutcher. Your Mama is not generally a fan of earth tone interiors–Your Mama's Momma was way, way, way too into the earth tones and we have a penchant for bright and shiny things–but we none the less think that Mister Dunning has succeeded in that he's respected the original design and spirit of the house without making it look like a cheap decorative time capsule. This looks to Your Mama both modern–as in up to date–and sexy vintage 1978, the sort of place Ali MacGraw, Goldie Hawn, David Geffen, Dyan Cannon, Ryan O'Neal and Linda Ronstadt might have spent summer weekends smoking pot, doing lines, running lines and working on their tan lines.

A small, plant filled courtyard acts as a buffer between the bizzy Pacific Coast Highway and the house. A converging collection of horizontal and vertical lines and planes make up the signature architectural element of the house and a perfect harmony between inside and out is achieved through soaring walls of smoky glass that open and spill out onto the terrace that overlooks the sand and sea. A wide entrance hall–where Mister Dorff has a black baby grand piano–shuttles one into the main living space, an airy affair comprised of a double height dining area with brown tile flooring and a more intimate sunken living room with fireplace, chocolate milk colored shag carpeting, and built in cabinetry chock full of state of the art electronic equipment.

The shag carpeting continues right up the spiral staircase. With all due respect to Mister Dunning, carpeting on stairs is an inflexible no-no in Your Mama's big book of decorating dos and dont's. It just ends up looking matted and dirty, like the sort of carpeting found in a crack house and crack house carpeting just isn't a good look. Ever. The stairs spiral up and into the an office/library/lounge that is the hub from which all three bedrooms spoke. The upstairs lounge has a wall of book shelves–nice to know that Mister Dorff actually reads–and is simply furnished with pair of matching Eames loungers and a drum set. We're guessing Mister Dunning didn't include the drum set in his original plans for the room and we'd get them out of there because not only do they look like scary spider monsters, they make an atrocious clamor when played in a private home.

The children will note Misters Buff and Hensman's clever way of bring both light and the ocean view deep into the interior of the house with huge voids in the walls of the office/library/lounge and ocean side master bedroom that obliterate any visual obstruction between the rooms. Mister Dorff and whatever ladee-friend he may be entertaining nowadays can sit quietly in those Eames loungers reading something by Phillip Roth or maybe Isabel Allende and see the ocean through the void, over the air space above the dining room, through a second void, across the master bedroom and out the wall of windows that open from the master bedroom to its private terrace. Well done gentleman, well done.

Mister Dorff's nearby neighbors include David Spade, music mogul Lou Adler (and his big-balled son Cisco whose house perches on the bluff across the PCH and just above Daddy Adler's), and right next door is the beach house of Oscar winning actress Charlize Theron and her long time man friend, actor Stuart Townsend who, it has been widely reported, is camped out in the ocean front house in the aftermath of the high wattage couple's alleged bust up.

Back in October of 2008 Your Mama discussed Mister Dorff's 1 bedroom and 2 pooper penthouse pied a terre in Manhattan, which at the time he had listed for sale with an optimistic asking price of $3,000,000 and for lease fully furnished with an asking price of $15,000 per month. The Chelsea neighborhood penthouse was later taken off the market and then put back on in early 2009 with an asking price of $2,650,000. In November of 2009, the penthouse was taken off the market. Your Mama finds no record of a transaction indicating that Mister Dorff still owns the West 19th Street apartment that features a glorious and generously sized roof terrace.

photos: Sotheby's International Realty / Jonah Wilson

It's Back...

...It seems that the listing for Nic Cage's former Bel Air mansion–the Gerard Colcord designed one once owned by cheesy crooner Tom Jones and boozy crooner Dean Martin–is just never going to go away. After listing the house for $35,000,000 way back in 2007, chopping the price all the way to $17,500,000 and then losing it to foreclosure in early April of 2010, the now lender-owned property is back on the market with an asking price of $12,750,000.

Interestingly and not surprisingly to anyone who has been inside the house, the property is now being marketed as a bit of a fixer upper with listing text reading, "Bring this home up to today's standards..." In the right hands, it really could be a beauty, an awkward beauty perhaps, but awkward beauty really is the best kind. Just ask a model booker.

Anyhoo, the children will notice that many of the light fixtures–sconces and chandeliers alike–have been removed from the house. Of course, Your Mama don't know a piece of wood from a bunch of grapes, but we're guessing Mister Cage snatched them all off the wall and out of the ceiling and has them in storage, perhaps out in that airplane hangar he's rumored to lease at the Santa Monica airport where he stores his vast collection of vintage automobiles.

Whatever the case, Your Mama wonders if Mister Cage had priced the house at $12,500,000 to begin with if he'd have sold it long ago and spared himself the hassle and indignity of foreclosure.

photo: Pacific Coast News

The Psycho Lady's Bev Hill House Goes on the Market

SELLER: Estate(s) of Janet Leigh and Robert Brandt
LOCATION: Beverly Hills, CA
PRICE: $3,395,000
SIZE: 4 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Okay puppies, Your Mama is well aware that actress Janet Leigh has been dead for nearly 6 years and that her 4th and last huzband Robert Brandt passed on to the great director in the sky in September of 2009. However, Miz Leigh and Mister Brandt lived in this home for for 30+ years, according to all the obits both died in this house and according to property records it is still owned by Mister Brandt, or at least the estate of Mister Brandt.

Starting back in the mid 1940s, Miz Leigh–the very famous mother of Lady Haden-Guest otherwise known as Jamie Lee Curtis–starred in more than 60 films including Little Women with Dame Elizabeth Taylor and the adult diaper pusher June Allyson, Orson Welle's gorgeous film noir Touch of Evil, The Manchurian Candidate and Bye Bye Birdie. Her most enduring role, the one that solidified her place among the lexicon of Tinseltown's most iconic actresses and earned her both Golden Globe and Academy Award nominations, was as Marion Crane, the embezzling secretary in Psycho who gets brutally offed in the shower by a creepy, dagger wielding Norman Bates.

Miz Leigh and her last huzband, stockbroker Robert Brandt, were married in 1962 and remained married until Miz Leigh died in 2004. According to property records, the couple purchased this woodsy contemporary crib in the Beverly Hills Post Office in October of 1976 for $357,500. Records on file with the Beverly Hills tax man indicate the house measures 4,432 square feet and includes 4 bedrooms and 5 poopers. Listing information, on the other hand, does not state a size and shows there are 4 bedrooms and just 4 poopers.

The half-acre plus sized and triangular shaped property, protected by electronic drive gates and ringed by mature landscaping and shade trees, sits high above Beverly Hills just south of Beverly Park, the illustrious gated community of steroidal mega-mansions. The approach to the front door is, we're sorry to say, lackluster, pedestrian and certainly not celebrity style due in large part to the front facing two-car garage and prison like chain link fencing that surrounds the tennis court and looms awkwardly over the mini motor court.

The house, built in 1976 according to listing information, has interior spaces that scream 1976. There are wood lined walls and wood lined vaulted ceilings, a lot of oatmeal colored wall to wall carpeting, and poopers with patterned tiles in every shade of earth tone. Large windows and oodles of sliding glass doors look out and open to tree top views that almost seem alpine, more South Lake Tahoe than Beverly Hills Post Office. The living room has a built in bar, natch, and a massive brick fireplace. Both are double sided situations that pass through to the library, a cozy if dated room lined with 1970s era book shelves and plantation shutters on the windows and sliding glass doors.

The kitchen, with its rust colored tile floor, nutmeg colored cabinetry, combination of butcher block and russet colored tile counter tops, butter yellow porcelain sink, and mixy-matchy melange of middle-brow appliances looks to Your Mama like someone dipped the damn room in formaldehyde back in 1984. It's not a bad kitchen in that it's decently sized, has large windows above the sink and counter top and opens to the small breakfast area and family room, but it's certainly a room that needs to be gutted, updated, upgraded and hauled into the 21st century. It also needs to have that dangerous pot rack removed before someone gets brained by a rogue copper frying pan that could come loose with even the most gentle earthquake.

A bridge over the main living spaces on the ground floor connects the upstairs bedroom wings that include a master suite with vaulted ceilings, tree top and city views through a wall of windows, a fireplace, sitting area, dressing room and dual poopers, one for Miz Leigh and the other for Mister Brandt. While Your Mama sees dual poopers as just another brawl with our imperious house gurl Svetlana who comes unglued at the mere mention of dual master poopers–it's a selfish conceit in her mind and just another unnecessary terlit to clean–many claim separate terliting and primping facilities are the very key to a happy relationship. Could be. After all Miz Leigh and Mister Brandt were married for an ice age.

Although the lot is well under an acre, Miz Leigh and Mister Brandt managed to squeeze in the aforementioned mini-motor court at the front, multi-level terracing at the back of the house, a large swimming pool surrounding by brick terracing, and an almost north/south aligned lighted tennis court that, according to listing photographs, has been immaculately maintained.

It's really not necessary for Your Mama to dig into the day-core because Miz Leigh and Mister Brandt's personal belongings have obviously been removed and replaced by Staging Lady in a Pink Toyota with a incongruous collection of white sofas, glammy mirrored tables and dressers, a truckload of bulbous pottery, and more fake orchid plants that Your Mama can be bothered to count.

We have a sneaking suspicion Miz Leigh and Mister Brandt's long time residence will be purchased and razed to make way for some sort of over-sized mock Mediterranean affair filled with elaborately carved corbels, fussy fireplace surrounds and acres of beige travertine and marble flooring. Perhaps we're having a weak architectural moment or an aneurysm but iffin we're being honest, and we always are, Your Mama would much rather have someone cotton to the particular beauties and wonders of this house–such as those soaring, wood lined ceilings–and figure out a way to transform this 1970s time capsule into something more current while retaining the spirit of the original house even if it isn't architecturally significant, you know? They can't all be Neutras, Woolfs, Robertsons or Boons, right? We reserve the right to change our mind on this depending on who buys the house and what architect they choose to build their own version of Barbie's Dream House.

Lorena Orozco... bella colombiana !

Lorena Orozco, bella modelo colombiana de 23 años. Fue catalogada como "La Mejor Cola" en la feria de Cali 2008-2009.

Mira el Megapost de Lorena Orozco haciendo click aquí